Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
Randomize
