There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
The "don't get cum on anything" rule also applies to my furniture and scarves
That's not technology. Doesn't count.
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
Randomize
