Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
Randomize
