I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
What would I even say at the wedding? "Sorry that I still wouldn't sleep with you after four years of you trying...but hopefully my sister here isn't that stubborn" and give him an awkward pat on the back?
i've hit rock bottom. Eating pringles and playing taylor swift on guitar in my underwear at 11am on a wedensday morning. Sober.
Randomize