You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
i just met rob pattinson in italy. he's so stupid, i feel like i would have to say "your penis goes here!"
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
She was wasted. Kept yelling "what if I'm pregnant" and trying to push me into the tree. First and last time I bring a girl to my family christmas party.
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
Like, what's the customary waiting period to hookup with your newly single ex that you never stopped hooking up with?
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Randomize