If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
Why are you speaking in third person?
Because I'm so hungover that I don't even want to be myself anymore.
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
you missed an awesome concert last night. some middle aged woman that was grinding on me kept trying to stick her hand down my pants. i ended up rewarding her tenacity by letting her hold onto it for a song, i think it made her night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
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