...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
Randomize
