I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
Being drunk at Chick-fil-A is a dystopian experience
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
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