Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
he's my edward cullen
I am pretty sure Edward Cullen never had an all-day drinking binge topped off with some blow.
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
He just got dropped off drinking a flask, sitting on the handlebars of a chinese delivery man's bike
Tonight's gonna be epic. Did he bring my noodles?
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
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