I'm a simple man, with a social life most psychopaths would cringe at
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
Do you think I could convince a doctor that my uterus is poisoning me? It wouldn't technically be a lie. It does more harm than good.
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
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