I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just realized that I have to choose between a future orthopedic surgeon and a dude currently in jail. My life is so fucked.
There was a time I was reining queen of Sunday funday... And at that same time I also weighed 20 pounds more, had the morale of a spearmint rhino stripper, and woke up most mornings asking more questions than fucking Barbara Walters. I think I just wrote my own epitaph.
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
Tonight I learned to never try to impress your ex by dancing on the stripper pole while drunk. That’s how you end up in the ER
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