just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize
