At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
there is nothing more satisfying than playing sudoku while pooping
ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
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