i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
I had a girl last night tell me that she was happy to find a condom wrapper in my garbage because,and I quote, "well at least you're not raw dogging every slore that crosses your path"
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
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