That's intense
How crunk are you?
I'm a Tom Selleck. Zero being Tipper Gore and max being the Bush twins
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just fell asleep during a bikini wax. Thank god for day drinking.
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
Randomize