It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
Just convinced airport security that im sober. All i do is win.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
Ever get that feeling that you're the back up booty call and half way through securing the fake date excuse to try to get in your pants, the guy hears back from the original booty call and drops the conversation with no explanation?
Randomize