I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
Just faked two orgasms bc I had too much wine and remembered mid sex that I bought doritos yesterday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
Randomize