You're so nebulous sometimes
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
We got so high we made milksteak
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
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