I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
Watching her eat just hurts me
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Randomize
