The best thing happened. Some guy was butchering Conway Twitty at karoke and the power went off in the whole bar. And someone shouted "you pissed jesus off when you messed with conway!"
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
Randomize
