So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
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