Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
remember when you found twisted pleasure condoms in my parents bathroom? theyre gone.
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
I worked so hard to shave everything last night. EVERYTHING. He WILL be answering my phone calls. Otherwise he's passing up awesome random birthday sex.
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
Randomize