Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
I had to switch to male Siri because I could feel female Siri voice judging me for reading my sexts out loud. Also, the dude voice keeps me in the mood.
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
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