my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
You know you're drunk when you have to be picked up out of a bathtub.
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
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