So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
Mom said you looked used
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
My sex life reached a new low tonight: we stopped into this bar so I could pee and when I got out of the bathroom my parents had ordered a round for us and this traveling nurse they met and were trying to run game for me. Saddest part? She was actually going for it.
Accidentally texted co-worker instead of bf “I’m wfh tomrw. Nooner? 💦”
Randomize
