Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
I'm wayyy too drunk to be in a parade right now
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
Just try not to have a boner when you're giving your best man speech, it will really kill the vibe
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Randomize
