you know whats weird about having a girlfriend....I look forward to masturbating now....sort of like quality me time.
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
Randomize
