Is it bad that my booty call's snoring was more interesting than the sex we had last night?
If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
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