What the fuck I just showed up to court still drunk and the judge told me I smelled like his wife
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
Randomize
