how hairy? two words: wookie tits
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
Randomize
