he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Randomize
