Barsexuality is the new black.
One of my residents in my hall just found my positive pregnancy test from last year I hid behind the fridge, I'm just going to tell them it was for a science project.
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
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