from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
My butt remains clenched, sir.
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
