you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
Randomize
