When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
I just don't fit in here. The other wives are ten years older and have kids!
Well, you chose trophy wife of a 35 year old over college. Sit in your suburban soup and stew.
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
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