I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
This baby is an asshole
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
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