My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
Here's the "to do" list i just found on my phone: buy stripper pole, make sex playlist, buy febreeze
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
Randomize
