fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
Randomize
