I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
You tried to tip the Uber driver with a meatball sub. Then, when he refused your meatball sub...you demanded he take you to the corner with the hookers. The valet has your keys and water balloons. I'm glad you're only in Chicago for the weekend.
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
