I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Randomize
