Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
Just talked to Kate. She said I called her on Friday night. She said I was crying for 5 minutes because we were parked in front of a fire hydrant.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sports announcer narrating myself making a sandwich. Your weed wins.
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
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