To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
I am naked and annoyed.
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
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