Skipping work because i'm still too drunk from last night still. got home at midnight and passed out in front of my door for 2 hours bc i couldn't find my key
had to call my rooommate to let us in. Passed out in my dress and found the key on my hair tie-in my hair- just now.
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
I just got into the cab. It smells like weed and the driver looks like someone who may or may not be really talented at playing the saxophone. He also asked me my thoughts on porn when I told him I'm an actor. I might not make it home.
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
What happened to fro yo and sex?
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
Randomize
