Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
Alright dude i'm gonna go to go sleep off this soberness. my life is a cosmic joke
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
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