this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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