Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
They were playing some sort of fast food scavenger hunt game as an ice breaker. Some chick stamped a Starbucks logo on my hand and told me to go find the girl with the matching stamp and fill her with cream.
Dave had an Arby’s stamp and some sorority girl grabbed him and screamed “I’ve have the meat!”\n
Randomize
