That's intense
I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
when she asked where we met, i said the liquor store. the next words out of moms mouth? 'oh that's real promising molly'
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
Randomize
