my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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