Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
I just watched an old episode of Daria while eating brownies to cure day drunkness. Clearly I'm winning at adulting today.
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