I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
What do I have to do to get you laid? I talked to that girl with the ugly dog for 45 minutes trying to get you in, and all you said was "Steven Spielberg is my favorite director."
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
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